staying true to you

     How do you stay true to yourself?  Right now, with the political and social climate that we live in, it's tough to dissect feelings and emotions to know what is true and what is a reflection of others.  If you spend any time on social media these days, no doubt the amount of one-sided posts you read  make your brain go crazy.  Our world is full of unrest and uncertainty, but it is also full of love.  The thing that we are missing the most is balance.  You have to approach social and political issues knowing where you stand on them and what your gut is telling you.  Be informed, do your research, but don't follow one particular person or voice just because they are the loudest or most well-known for their opinions.  Also, don't pick someone just because they are completely in alignment with your thoughts and opinions.  Wait...what?  You might be questioning that last statement.  Think about it.  If you only listen to people who have the exact same opinions that you do, how do you expand or open your mind to other perspectives?  That old saying that there are certain things to avoid in conversations with friends-politics, religion and finances...wrong.  If you have friends that are truly good friends you should be able to talk about these things to help expand your mind.  If we only surround ourselves with 'like-minded' people we really limit our sphere of thought expansion and acceptance.

     It's so easy to be persuaded to take one side in a situation when that's all that is in front of you.  If you don't ever consider the other side, or perspective, you can't make an informed decision or opinion for yourself.  This takes us back to 'staying true to you.'  How do you know when you are being true to you?  What does it feel like?  Can your opinion change?  The answers to those questions are pretty simple.  You will know that you are being true to your own beliefs and feelings when it feels good deep in your gut, in your heart and in your mind.  You will feel settled.  Yes, your opinion can change-it should.  The more that you know, the more you investigate, the more research you do, the more you learn-the more often you will find that your opinion changes.  A belief and an opinion are really not that different.  Some say that a belief is based on personal faith and an opinion is based on feelings and assumptions.  When you add in knowledge and understanding to feelings and assumptions, that seems a better definition of 'opinion.' 

     It is a good practice to try to not be defensive over your opinions and feelings.  When we become defensive over something we think we completely understand, we lose the possibility of learning more and having a more comprehensive understanding.  Simply put, keep an open mind, don't become defensive over your own opinions and be respectful and open to others opinions.  Yes, these things may seem like simple human behaviors, but when we're faced with difficult conversations or experiences-we tend to forget them all together.  

      If I were to think of all of the things I wanted to write about this month, this wasn't actually at the top of my list.  However, we are already embroiled in the Holiday season and this is often when difficult conversations can arise with family, friends or acquaintances.  From my own experiences this year, there have been plenty of conversations I have had myself that I find these reminders to be helpful.  This year, I started back at work full-time, sent one kid off to college, had the other kid enter high school and I myself have started back to college to finish my degree.  There has been so much change this year and many experiences that have forced me to reconsider my opinions in many different areas.  Like I mentioned earlier, we often base our opinions off of what is right in front of us-with a bit of tunnel vision.  As we have new experiences and shift our worldview, we can open our mind and understanding exponentially. 

     The full-time work that I do brings out the 'type-A' in my personality, and not always the beneficial parts of that.  It has been a great experience for me to re-examine some aspects of my own short-sightedness.  I'll write more on my experiences this year in another post.  When I am able to focus on my part-time work (reiki, life-guidance, yoga, etc.) I am able to soften and round out the corners of the type-A.  Under the layers of it all, I hope that the work(s) I do help spread love and understanding.  

     If there's one thing I can leave you with tonight-it's to remember to keep love at the forefront, all of the time.  Lead with love.  Lead with understanding, empathy and openness.  Remember these things as we head out to Holiday parties and gatherings.  Help spread love, not opinions and judgement.

Happy Holidays to you all!

With love and light~
Mandi