feeling all of the feels

What happens when we feel all of the feels?

"Let your feelings out! Don't hold them in!" How often do you see this or hear this being said or chanted? It's something that we encourage in this field, frequently. Something that isn't talked about, or explained, or even warned about is where all of that emotion and feeling goes. When we talk about not holding your feelings in, sharing how you feel or expressing your emotions, it's all about releasing the emotions and the energy that the emotions create inside of you. It's healthy to release and let go.

​When does it become unhealthy to release your emotions? Well, this is a tough one. You should always release your emotions, but you have to be careful who you're releasing them on and how you are doing it. We all have the right to feel and to emote, what we shouldn't be doing is projecting on to others. What you can't control is how you feel about something, what you can control is trying to make someone else feel the same way you feel. Often we think that by expressing ourselves (or unleashing) to someone else we are using a healthy form of releasing our emotions. This is not always true. Yes, sharing our feelings when they involve someone else is sometimes necessary for the strength of a relationship, but unleashing onto someone how you are feeling simply to let it out-is not.

​There are ways of releasing emotions that are healthy and cannot harm others. Journaling, meditating, yelling (in private), punching (a pillow), dancing, exercising, Reiki, bodywork and even having an Emotion Release session are all safe ways to release your emotions. It is very easy to project those emotions onto others when we 'let it out' in front of them. Be very cautious. Just because you are feeling a certain way, or having strong emotions about something doesn't mean that whoever else is involved needs to understand or take on those emotions as well.

Our emotions don't always need validation or understanding. Simply stating how we are feeling to someone else is a way of releasing the energy that has formed from an emotional event. It's when we expect that another person should share the same feelings or emotions-this is when we can project our 'stuff' on to them and can actually cause harm.

​Let me explain this in terms of an example. Have you ever been around someone who is really angry or frustrated about a situation? Maybe that person decides to unleash their frustrations on you and share with you how they are feeling about that situation in vivid detail. You start out not understanding why they are so upset over the situation. As the conversation goes on, you do begin to feel frustrated for them. You feel anger and frustration begin to swirl around inside of you where there was none before. The conversation ends and you walk away. As you go on with your day, your mood has decidedly gone from relaxed and happy to obviously cranky and short-tempered, and you're wondering-'why?' You wouldn't automatically think that you absorbed the emotional energy of the person you had the conversation with, but in fact, that is exactly what happened. Often we want someone else to understand how we are feeling about something, so we will explain in such detail until they begin to truly 'get' why we are feeling the way we do. This is when projecting emotions and emotional energy can happen and suddenly-the other person is feeling emotions that they previously had no part of.

​This is all not to say that we shouldn't share how we are feeling or even let someone know when they have hurt us-we just have to be very careful about how that sharing happens. Everyone has feelings and emotions, but those feelings and emotions belong to each individual person and should stay in the energy field of that person and not get forced on other people.

​The exceptions to this are, of course, feelings and emotions that are helpful to the collective. It never hurts to share love, happiness, joy and peace with others! There are many emotions we can share that are beneficial to others, we just have to be very careful about the emotions that we can share that cause harm. It's very rarely intentional. What we can be intentional about is spreading emotions that are helpful and healing.

​Love and Light~
​Mandi